I am 21 years old and I just found out I am 5 weeks pregnant. However, I have graduated already with my Bachelors degree, am EXTREMELY motivated, and am headed for graduate school. My boyfriend and I are seriously committed and our relationship is better than I could ask for. He is 23 and ready for our family, and we have decided that I should continue pursuing graduate school since the child will be younger and will not notice mommy being gone for a bit. However, my family is horrified and are trying to convince me that graduate school is no longer an option and they are treating my like I’m a teenage pregnancy. I know I am young, but I have accomplished things many people years older than me have not. So which matters more, the fact that I have a Bachelors degree and acceptance for graduate school or the fact that I’m 21 years old and pregnant? I am confused.
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Tags: being, Early, Just, negative, People, Pregnant, Some, Very, years
13 is to young.
Your the one behind the drivers seat in your life. Although your family is trying to help, its best you make the decisions that you want. Your an adult.
what matters is your personality and how you handle responsibility.
i think as long as you have graduated highschool and are fiancially stable its fine, i graduated when i was 17, and had my first at 19
I don`t think its early!;]
Because you`re pass your teen life and now your an adult!=D
As long as you finish school you can get marry and have a family.
Some people marry at that age.Lol
HA, yeah 21 is a little young, but your head is on straight, you have goals and so does the child’s father. Keep doing what you are doing and ignore the haters.
some people are being way to negative. its great that u have graduated with ur bachelors and got accepted for grad school it shows that u know how to handle ur life and school at the same time. congrats.
no it’s not to young,, i was 20 when i had my first… you are an adult. the womans body is most healthy during her 20′s….
21 is only too early if you’re not ready. You seem to want to do it, and you’re bf does too. Yall sound very committed and I wouldn’t worry about what other people are telling you. Some people have babies at twelve… they are too young, you are not!
tell them to mind their own business. seems like you have a lot going for you. they’re probably just jealous that you could get so far so young.
they probably think you need time to party and make all those stupid mistakes that people in their 20′s make. but you could be smarter than that. it sounds like it. congrats btw
CONGRATS! you are definately not too young to have a child right now. I do believe however that you will find it difficult to persue graduate school during pregnancy and while the baby is young. it’s really hard to leave a new baby.
if you are ready for this baby,then you go on ahead.you sound mature and focused.yes it will be hard to study and look after the baby,but loads of people do it. if you feel in your heart you want this baby,then go for it.
enjoy!
Edit
ummm thumbs down are for people who give Negative answers????
No I don’t think that is to young at all. You seem very responsible and have a good track on your life so far. So with that being said Congrats and Good Luck!
Hello there.
No. 21 is NOT too young..If you are ready then there is nothing wrong with having a baby..
I’m 14 going on 15 and i think i’m pregnant..
=/
I am too young..
But i’m going to deal with it..
you can do it..
Good luck..
I think 21 is just fine, I personally am 21 and 19 weeks pregnant, anyone who has something negative to say about it can kiss my a**. You are very accomplished already, your baby will be proud of you.
21 is a lttle young… but there are 30 year olds that aren’t ready for babies and 17 year old that are. I think maturity is the main thing. If you are both ready emotionally and doing okay financially then I think you are just fine to have that baby and if anyone says otherwise tell them to kiss where the sun doesn’t shine.
You and your boyfriend sound in love, mature and responsible. Stick to your plan, it’s a good one, and ignore everyone else…and good luck!!!
They are right, you should take a year out? the childs first year is crucial for you to bond with him/her not to mention do you really want to miss their first steps, words etc if you do I guarantee you will regret it for the rest of your life.
I see no problem…You’ve been successful and are ready. I was 17 when i had my little girl…I wasnt ready…I gave her up for adoption….BUT anywho…you should go to school…do what you want…Go to school and have a family…Lots of people do!
Not at all! I think it is so awesome that you can (and will) do both! First it is awesome to be a young parent becasue you can relate more to you kids and keep up with the better. Don’t let your family sway your ambitions…if you want to go to grad school is awesome and you should do it now! if you don’t you will either regret it or try and do it later in life when you are too old or too busy! Now is the best time. All the best of luck to you!!
i think it sounds like you have a great life and should be happy and i congratulate you and your boyfriend i think if you can do it graduate school is totally doable you just have to realize that it might take a little longer with baby that without because to be a good mommy you may have to take less classes than planned and maybe miss a few
good luck and congrats
this is a decision for you andd your partner. You should consider all things before making your chose, and recongnize that you will have a very special bond with your new born and going to school will be hard for both you and the baby. There is also the matter of breastfeeding. its the best choice you can make for you child, are you ready to pump inbetween classes? Having to stay up studing, and sometimes losing sleep to comfort your child?
It’s great that you have accomplished so much and that you are so motivated, but being a mom is another GREAT accomplishment, and learning how to give of yourself is the biggest of them all.
My point is that it will be hard, you may want to at least wait a year or so, don’t rush to a choice.
Again, this is your choice, and not your familys.
GOOD LUCK!
I think that if you are committed to going to school and have the ability to do so(funding and someone to watch baby once he/she arrives) then totally go for it! That stinks that people aren’t supporting you in this. As long as you intend on being a mom to this baby and doing the best you can then more power to you. It sounds like you need to focus on what you think is best for you and your family(BF and baby to be) and ignore nay sayers. You do the best you can and love that baby! Thats all that matters! Good luck and Congratulations and YES, you HAVE done a lot more than a lot of people your age so go you! :O)
I don’t think age is an important factor when it comes to pregnancy. Your situation and what you are able to provide for your child are both much more important. You sound like a mature person in a stable environment. I also don’t think that having a degree under your belt makes you a better person and/or more equipped to be a parent (no offence meant) although it does show that you are a hard worker and ambitous. Ask yourself (and encourage your parents to ask themselves too), are you ready for the commitment of being a mother, are you able to provide your baby with a stable loving home… if yes, then go for it.
Congratulations
Go with how you feel. It is your life. Getting pregnant is God’s business. You are pregnant. Congratulations I am so happy for you. Enjoy this time. Your partner is happy. You too have it all. Congratulations.
Its not too young. I was 18 when I had my daughter, and I’ve done just fine. People will be negative about it, but you’ve just got to stay strong and on the positive side. Hey, you’ll get to be more involved with your kids and one day grandkids, because you’ll have more energy. You can still go to school. You might decide to take a break from it right after the baby is born if you feel its right. I personally went back to work a week after I had my daughter and will be going back to college in August when my daughter will be 10 months old. Find someone you trust to help out with babysitting and you will be able to continue your studies and be a mom. Good luck, and congrats!
wow! I think they are overreacting.In fact compared to others you are late.
You sound like you have a good head on your shoulders and they shoud be proud! Congratulations!
i was 22 when i had my second child and you are way ahead of where i was. congradulations on all your achievments!!! If you and your boyfriend thinks its the right time then go for it. its your decision and even with a baby you dont have to forget about your dreams!! You can do anything you set your mind to. It may be hard at times but you can do it. Don’t let anyone make you think you cant!! Good luck and Congrats!!
Your not very young at 21 and pregnant. 13 and pregnant is VERY YOUNG. Your just young. A lot of people are negative or jealous about it.
NO I think your boyfriend is right you need to go to graduate school now. Your family should understand if you put it off now you probably wont be able to go back later.
Best of luck
Im 21 and Im 12 weeks pregnant. If YOU feel you are ready for a family, then why do you care what other people think? You’ve already accomplished so much. Be a proud mama. Congrats on the pregnancy.
Some people may be worried that it is too soon on the basis that your only 21 and haven’t really lived yet. I have known people to go a lil wild after having a child at around 21, they feel they missed the wild bar hopping party stage of their lives. But I have known people who got pregnant right after high school, got married and raised a beautiful family without going through the drinking years of life! You sound as though you have your head on your shoulders and are really mature! Go to graduates school! You can do it! It sounds like the father is really supportive and that will help! I say forget the negative! Show them that you can more than handle being a mommy at 21! Good luck to you!
I personally think it’s fine. I know there are teen’s now that are pregnant and are only in the 6, 7 and 8th grade. That is what worries me
I think if you are oyung motivated, and obviously well-established, then you are fine also it’s great that your cont. grad school! If you need some one to talk to feel free to IM or email… Congrats and good luck!
Of course you are confused. I am sorry your family is responding so negatively to your situation at a time when they should be supportive. I believe from all you posted that you will be just fine, no matter what. It sounds like the only thing that would make things better than they are would be support from your family. Hopefully they will change over time.
You sound very mature and capable of raising a child while still attending school. I had a child when I was 20 and I still went on to graduate with a masters degree 3 years later. I now have a great job and can afford to put my child into a great school. The most important thing is to show people that your studies mean a lot to you as well as your baby. Life does not stop when you have a kid, ask your family to support you so you can support your baby in the future. Good luck honey.xx
I don’t think it is too early. I had my first child when I was 24. As long as you and your boyfriend are emotionally and financially stable, then as long as you two are happy, then who cares what anyone else says. Their attitudes will change once the baby comes. My mom always told me that she would never babysit my kids so I could get some “me” time. What a liar! She won’t leave my kids alone!
I think you have a good plan. I had my first daughter when I was 21, but no career plans. I became a stay at home mom for awhile and work part time now. If you have a goal and are close to acheaving it then go for it!! Baby can go to daycare while you are at school, start saving your money now so it wont be so hard later. It’s great that the dad is involved and supportive. Grad School is an option, prove them wrong and become the success you know you can be. Find people who are supportive of your choice and stay around them to help you through this. It is important to fullfill your dreams, then you will not have regrets later. Spend as much time with your baby as you can because it is important for bonding when he/she is little. Congratulations!!
There are a lot of responsibilities that your parents may not think you’re ready to take on. They have a right to worry – they’ve been doing it for 21 years now. The fact that your boyfriend is supportive is a major positive. A lot of girls aren’t that lucky, and I hope you two stay close throughout all of the obstacles.
1. Graduate school takes time. Babies take time. Most new mothers barely get to sleep. Plus, both things are costly. Are you and your boyfriend financially ready to take this step? It’ll be hard, but balancing a baby and grad school simultaneously will be difficult. Possible, but difficult.
2. What plans do you have with your boyfriend? Is there talk of marriage? You and him need to sit down and map out a plan, with the involvement of a baby. Are you going to move in together?
Just remember that babies require constant attention and a lot of money. Regardless of age or maturity level, you need to be willing to put your life on hold to successfully raise your child.
I don’t think that you are young!!! You sound really responsible and ready for this baby. GOOD LUCK TO YOU! I know how you feel especially with a family that does not support you.
That is a perfectly fine age. You are mature enough to carry successfully, yet young enough to withstand the strains. Here’s wishing you a healthy baby.
I am also 21 and pregnant…very similar situation! My boyfriend is also 23 and we have been together 3 years..we have both just graduated, me from a law degree, and him from a masters of science , and people STILL comment that we are way too young! I dont know if this is cos we are not married? But I have no intentions of rushing into a cheap 5 minute wedding just to get a piece of paper..Keep going with your education, it will be a better future for your child in the long run..You may just have to postpone for a year or so..I intend to do a post graduate degree when my baby is born..People act as if becoming pregnant means the last 4 years at university were a waste as my career will be put on hold! But you are right, many people do not even have a degree, its not like you are a teenager who has flunked out of school with no education behind you. You are both educated adults who will be able to give a baby a good life..
What I find really strange as well is that the generations before us commonly had children at 21, 20, and even 19, but it seems to be double standards when a couple are married…but there is no basis to this..
Anyway, it sounds like you have thought things through and have everything planned out well! Prove all these skeptics wrong! The three of you will be fine, Good luck with everything, hope all goes well
#1, get married and raise your child with both parents committed.
#2, your family needs to trust your decisions, as you have made some good ones in the past, I hope.
#3, Getting pregnant now was undoubtedly unplanned, which was not a good decision, so your family has reservations.
#4, You are barely out of your teens and so they are concerned.
#5, You aren’t married, they are concerned. Can you put their shoes on for a minute or two and try to understand?
You and your bf should get married and maybe that will help them feel better. I hope he has a good job that can support both of you and daycare. If not, you may have to put school on the back burner for a while. Good luck.
Your parents probably just want you to be married. I don’t think it is actually about having a child at your age. As long as you are happy and you are satisfied with the way your new baby will affect your plan. Don’t let you parents tell you what to do. Your expectations of yourself are more important then what they expect from you.
You are young but not to young. Sounds to me like you and your boyfriend have spent some time in serious talk. A child is a glorious event however the glory does fade when you over work yourself. Do the best you can to pace yourself and don’t be shy to accept help. Your family will come around, babies have a way of softening the hardest of attitudes.
Your family would probably feel better if you were married, but if you haven’t already made that choice then don’t. Marriage because of a coming child isn’t the way to start a life together. Wait until you are certain.
In the meantime relax, be confident in your successes and be proud to be pregnant (not everyone can do that either). Plan your lives the best you can and it will all work out just fine.
Congrats and best wishes for a wonderful life.
I think 21 is a good age to start a family. And if you can financially support the baby there shouldn’t be a problem. Congratulations!
no but congratulations
It is never too late to reach your goals even with a child. YOu keep on striving to do your best to get where you want to be in life. You have to make your life decisions cause you are the one who is going to benefit and decide the next steps. DO not give up at all you have been blessed with a great bf who is very supportive and wants to see you accomplish your dreams even thou you are preganat he is still very supportive which is a plus. YOur family is very upset right now but you can not turn back the hands of time now they will just have to accept your decisions and be supportive of you. You have come a long way more than most people and I am proud of you myself. There are many people who have become pregnant before 21 and still have graduated and still standing strong to accomplish their goals. DO not let no one throw you off track from your goals. Keep being strong and go get what is yours do not let nothing stand in your way. YOu are going in the right direction to make a better future for yourself and your family they will realize that in the long run thou. The most important matter is that you have your head on straight you know what you want and no matter what you are willing to continue to achieve your goals without letting your pregnancy stop you. YOu are a strong mature person keep your head up and all the negative people trying to stand in your way just push them aside and keep on going. STAND STRONG SISTA!!
They are most likely jealous…
you have accomplished much, bachelors degree and grad school. You are the one who decides. It can be done. I’m in grad school pregnant and with a two yr old. It’s hard, but i manage. I would say keep going. take as much as you can while you are pregnant.. once the baby comes your time will be very very limited.
Good job and Good Luck
I think its great that your going to continue grad school!!
I was 21 when I became pregnant (similar situation with school) and I was just accepted into med school. So 1) congrats on your pregnancy! wonderful news! and 2) don’t let anyone tell you you cant do something, your child has two great roll models
Reading your post, you have said a couple of interesting things that you should pay attention to.
1. “I’ve graduated,” which means you have entered into the “adult” world.
2. ” My boyfriend and I are seriously committed…”, “he is 23 and ready…” It’s bad to say but in today’s world it’s hard enough to found a guy who’s willing to accept the fact that he’s going to be a father; you on the other hand have someone who is welcoming the thought of being a husband and a father.
3. “…we have decided that I should continue pursuing…” Already you guys seem to understand that it is no longer about “I” or “Me” but more so about what’s best for the potential family you two will have. To be quite honest, it doesn’t matter what your family wants, at the end of the day, you have to be happy with the decision you made and if your family truly loves you, which it sounds like they do, they will support any decision “you” make. Please, never let anyone talk you out of something you have weighed the options to, otherwise you might not have the degree you have now. If you and your boyfriend are being totally honest with each other and about your future, and you guys, together, are willing to do what it takes to make your future work, then it’s up to you not your family. If your family care about your happiness they will love and support you either way.